My little Christmas miracle 

For years I used to say I didn’t enjoy being with parents around the holidays. Mostly because I couldn’t have my own children. Then it was too hard to see them all so happy. It was me. I was telling myself that I didn’t want to be around anyone who had kids. What the heck? Why? This was my family.  How could I feel that way?  
This Christmas, I finally was free to do what I wanted and what I wanted was to see my family. To hang out with my cousins.  There are 8 children running, playing and growing up so fast. I hadn’t seen them in years. I never felt sad. Not about my soon to be ex not being there, not about not having kids, nothing. I was so happy. Genuinely happy to be there and living in the moment. We had great conversations and I never once felt judged. I never realized how suppressed I felt. Wow. Just wow. 
It was my Christmas miracle to realize that I’m free. I’ve released all that stress and anger. I was my authentic self and I liked her! 

About our last embryo

I have been diagnosed with Endometriosis, Adenomyosis and Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. I've had Lyme, Bell's Palsy and the Shingles before I was 25. I've done IVF, with and without immunosuppression and FET. I have had two miscarriages. I am married to my best friend and I am Infertile. Through these struggles, I had to unlearn and relearn many things, through spirituality and alternative healing modalities, I have begun the process of becoming who I am supposed to be. A healer.
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