I know pain

Someone I cared about recently said to me, “you wouldn’t understand(his pain), you weren’t married for 22 years and had that ripped away from you all of a sudden.” 

He’s right. I probably will never know how that feels. I may never be married for that long. I may never find anyone. 

But what I do know is this…

I’ve had two pregnancies ripped away from me in an instant. 

I had both of my tubes removed because of disease and therefore the possibility of ever having children naturally taken away from me. 

I’ve done three rounds of IVF and no children. 

I’ve had my heart crushed so many times. 

I have endometriosis and other autoimmune diseases that cause me to be in pain or bleed to the point of anemia and gain weight. 

I am allegic to wheat and milk! It sucks. And…

I was married to someone who I don’t think ever loved me. 

But I will be ok. 

About our last embryo

I have been diagnosed with Endometriosis, Adenomyosis and Hashimoto's Thyroiditis. I've had Lyme, Bell's Palsy and the Shingles before I was 25. I've done IVF, with and without immunosuppression and FET. I have had two miscarriages. I am married to my best friend and I am Infertile. Through these struggles, I had to unlearn and relearn many things, through spirituality and alternative healing modalities, I have begun the process of becoming who I am supposed to be. A healer.
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